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20 hilarious Halloween jokes for kids

Get ready for spooky season with these Halloween jokes! Grab a frightfully delicious snack, brush up on Halloween history, then get ready to startle your mates with these glorious gags…

Funny Halloween jokes

What’s a monster’s favourite game?

Hide and shriek!

Why did the vampire go to the doctor?

She couldn’t stop coffin!

What do birds say on Halloween?

Trick or tweet!

What does a ghost panda eat?

Bam-BOO!

a giant panda grasps some green bamboo and pulls it towards their open mouth. The panda is a black and white bear with soft, round black ears and a white face.
“Keep your paws off my snacks, ghosties!”

What type of music do mummies like?

Wrap!

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?

They had no body to go with!

How do spirits send letters?

Through the ghost office!

Why didn’t the zombie go to school?

He felt rotten!

Why are vampires terrible at cricket?

Their bats fly away!

Halloween jokes for kids | a soft grey-brown bat soars through the air, its leathery wings outstretched
“I’m fang-tastic at getting out of sports day!”

Why are ghosts bad liars?

You can see right through them!

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Where do zombies go on holiday?

The Dead Sea!

Why didn’t the skeleton take any chances?

They didn’t have the guts!

What owls say when they go trick or treating?

Happy Owl-oween!

Halloween jokes | a snowy owl, a white bird with black specks on its wings, sits on a bank of snow. It's looking into the camera with its eyes closed and mouth open, so it looks a bit like it's laughing
“These jokes are a HOOT!”

What’s a monster’s favourite dessert?

Ice scream!

What happens to witches who break school rules?

They get ex-spelled!

Why didn’t the scarecrow finish dinner?

It was already stuffed!

What do demons eat for breakfast?

Devilled eggs!

Halloween jokes for kids | a brown hen with a red face looks into the camera. It's standing outside on a grassy path.
“I hope your cursed breakfast tastes egg-xcellent!”

What’s the spookiest piece of cutlery?

A spoooooooooon!

How do vampires keep fit?

They play bat-minton!

What’s a ghost’s favourite food?

Boo-berries!

Think you’ve got a better Halloween joke? Share it in the comments below!

All images © Adobe Stock.
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